Top Reasons Why New Year’s Resolutions Don’t Work:

New Years Resolutions

At this time of year many of us will be evaluating our successes and challenges that we have navigated throughout 2021. People attempt to set new goals and objectives for the new year. Some of us are really disciplined and have developed great strategies. However, many will embark on these goals with great determination but within a few weeks into the new year, these goals will be pushed aside for a variety of reasons.

Based on my experience as a Life Coach, I hope the below will identify some of the reasons these resolutions and goals are left unobtained. Even if just a couple of the tips below are utilised, this will help you on the way to achieving some of your goals in 2022.

  1. Poorly framed goals that are structured in the negative
    • The chance of succeeding is significantly stronger by focusing on what we want to achieve in the positive rather than a goal phrased in the negative E.g. “I want to give up smoking” and “I want to lose weight”.
    • It would be better to rephrase this as,  “I want to focus on embarking on a healthy lifestyle for me and my family for 2022”
  2. Begin With The End in Mind and Visualization
    • What is it going to be like when I achieve this goal?
    • Why is this resolution important to me?
    • What will be my weekly and daily plan to achieve this objective?
    • What blockers are there I need to overcome; is this my husband or partner
    • What resources will I need?
    • If you can’t answer the above or crystalize a powerful vision of the future of attaining this goal, you will not have the energy to keep going when things go wrong as in all quests or journey to achieve a goal
  3. Eat That Frog- Brian Tracy
    • What is the hardest step I could take each day to hit my goal?
    • Choosing to do this and tackle part of the trickiest goal first thing each morning will give you the energy and momentum to achieve
  4. Little Rewards and Milestones
    • Those that have little rewards for the smaller milestones are more likely to keep going
    • Perhaps for every single cigarette box or capsule not smoked means a couple of quid saved in a jar for something positive
    • Tea cake reward for two pages written of your future number best seller
  5. Battle With The Inner Critic vs The Inner Coach
    • The mind can be for you or against you
    • Need to be aware of the conversations with yourself “You are not good enough”, “stay in your lane”,you have failed in the past you will fail again
    • These are a range of negative thoughts that can arise from conversations with yourself
    • Action illusion- lots of talk of doing and want to act but a lack of action
    • Fear of Failure – If I don’t try then I won’t fail and let myself or others down
    • I’ll do this goal when I feel better
    • Right feelings come after right actions; even a little step each day can help to create momentum
  6. Lack of Understanding of Stinky Kippers – Limited Beliefs – Kain Ramsey
    • Many are unaware of our hidden beliefs that are in the background subconsciously driving us daily
    • There are typically 15-20 stinky kippers/limited beliefs- some we can easily identify and others will take some discovery, deep thinking, questioning and possibly discovery or self-reflection with a coach to unearth and tackle further
    • These are often formed at the age of 4-11 based on life experiences or interactions with friends or family  
    • Takes 3-4 situations during this phase that form a belief that are buried without knowledge
    • Despite these being negative we will often fight to maintain these limitations subconsciously
    • These hidden chains will subconsciously pull you down
    • May be worth working with a life coach or deep thinking or evaluation exercises to flesh out these gremlins
  7. Birds of Feather – Lack of Accountability Partner
    • If you want to be successful in an area or achieve a goal it will help to have network of others that have successfully been on the journey and are successful positive forces – recommend by Les Brown and Brian Tracy
    • If you have a reference group that you lean on that doesn’t share a passion for personal improvement or endorse your goal, it’s likely your journey will become even more challenging
    • Having a coach, mate or colleague for a monthly or regular catch-up will give you more energy to hold you accountable giving you a cadence point
    • This needs to be someone that is empathic not sympathetic as this will help to hold you to account on the journey to achieving your goal
  8. Not being honest about your progress
    • Need to develop a mindset and to become brutally honest about your progress and actions each week
    • Many people often don’t like criticism as we don’t like to be wrong
    • To achieve our goals we need to be a little better at being able to objectively deal with the truth of our progress
    • Need to avoid becoming the BSE syndrome – Blame Someone Else – Paul McGee Sumo
  9. Dealing with Setbacks-Solution driven not problem focused
    • Simple equation in life that has been coined from the great book Man’s Search For Meaning
    • Situation + Response = Outcome vs Situation = Outcome
    • Many in life are unaware that there is always a small action in our control to tackle a bad situation. We always have some ability to control our response to our thoughts or unpredicted circumstance
    • What is this unexpected situation or setback asking of me rather than asking what am I asking of this situation?
  10. First 90 days
    • Repetition and continuous application for something to become a habit and become burned into our mindset
    • If you can get to 90 days, the chance of success improves and maintaining traction dramatically increases
  11. Re-assess goals
    • Often with slimmer’s, they have great initial goal and make solid progress but once their body adapts or gets to a point,  then it’s difficult to maintain the same rate of progress
    • This stage is vital to adapt fitness or goals to maintain momentum

Feel free to explore some of the authors, sources or feel free to reach out to me if you feel you need a coach or accountability partner to help achieving your goals for 2022.

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